After the first couple of stages were completed out at Nabilla Riverlink Estate, they called in some marketing expert to work out what they needed to tell people about the estate.

The answer?

“The blocks at Nabilla are big enough to swing a cat!”

Genius. As if it took some pony-tailed marketing geek to work that one out.

Anyway, they weren’t sure they could go around talking about swinging cats (political correctness and all). The last thing we want to do is encourage people to test the size of their own backyard. So they came and asked me to sit on a swing while they took a photo. That way, they didn’t have to put their butts on the line by saying it. They could just get people to think it for themselves.

The “Enough room” campaign was a hit. They had people falling over themselves to buy one of these big blocks. Fair enough, too. The average size block at Nabilla is more than 1000sqm. That is big. Big enough to ... well ... you get the picture.

But here’s what rubs my fur up the wrong way. Did they offer me more money? Or any money at all? Not a brass razoo. They just wanted more pics of me. And who could blame them? I am a pretty good looking specimen. So, since then, we’ve done a few photo shoots, the odd public appearance, and I hope to get a mention at some awards ceremony in the near future.

In the meantime, the publicity hasn’t been half bad. The young girls love a celebrity and life’s been good. Now that I have set up a permanent home at Nabilla Riverlink Estate, I’ve got lots of room to move. In fact, I’ve got enough room to ... build a swing for the kids.

If you come on out to have a look, drop in – I’ll even autograph some merchandise for you. But if you feel the urge to swing something, take up golf.